Filk Happens

 This thing needs a tune and my joints can't tolerate guitar or fiddle; if someone wants to try, go ahead.

Inspired by ysabetwordsmith's wonderful character of Shiv, ECR Boy, Hugo Lightfingers, or any other name he might be known by. I can definitely picture the Finn children learning about Shiv's escapades in Ysabet's "Best Teach It To Dance" and making him a song.

CHORUS:

Children, remember when you are,

And adults wary of what lingers

By your side or in your pack

For stealing your nifty new knick-knack

Is Hugo Lightfingers.

Somewhere there's a man without a cloak

Who watches all the modern folk

And it's them he'll pick and prod and poke

And that's Hugo Lightfingers.

CHORUS
 

When trouble calls, he's at the field,

A basket he chooses to wield,

Or else they'll unwillingly yield

To that Hugo Lightfingers.

CHORUS
 

Distraction at the forge, a blond-haired smith

Keeps eyes on him, away from the myth,

The legend, leaving only pith,

The man Hugo Lightfingers.

CHORUS

 

The man with the quick hand, he can dance

And put the people in a trance

So he can switch tablet for lance

'Cause he's Hugo Lightfingers.

CHORUS
 

I once knew a man who learned and fought

But with a cell phone he was caught

And so a lesson he was taught

By one Hugo Lightfingers.

CHORUS

So leave electronics in your tent,

Get what anachronism meant,

Or else you'll find the rules are bent

When you meet Hugo Lightfingers!